Everyone feels angry from time to time, it has evolved as part of our normal 'Fight or Flight' reflex. It isn't bad in itself, but if it gets out of control it can become a problem.
When we become angry a cocktail of hormones, such as adrenaline and noradrenaline surge through the body, releasing energy and preparing us to fight. These chemicals, if in too large a quantity, tend to swamp the rational, thinking parts of our brain and allow the instinctive part to take over. We are in danger of losing control, and the actions we take while in the grip of strong anger may seem extreme once we have calmed down.
Some people bottle up their anger, not dealing with it until it emerges explosively, and they 'go up like a bottle of pop'. Others might simmer with anger all the time, making life unpleasant for partners and family.
I frequently get enquiries about children who are angry and displaying aggressive behaviour. The parent is at their wits end having tried everything in their power to stop the outbursts, the school is threatening to exclude the child and with this there are many fears and fantasies about the youngsters’ future.
Just as with adults it is important to teach the child that anger (the feeling) is a natural emotion telling us something is wrong but the aggression (behaviour) is not an OK way of expressing it.
Anger is a normal emotion that everyone experiences from time to time. It is part of our evolutionary heritage and forms a component of the 'Fight or Flight' reflex which has helped our species survive. When we become angry the fight or flight hormones, such as adrenaline and noradrenaline are released, giving us extra energy, strength and stamina. The problem is that these chemicals tend to suppress the rational parts of our minds allowing instinctive reactions to take over.
This gives an important clue to managing anger. Once the 'fight' hormones are pumping through our bodies we have less control, so the time to control anger is before it takes over. This is the basis of the advice to 'count to ten'.
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